POO

It crossed my mind the other day, while I was perched on the
throne, that there is a lot of excess poo taking place in the
world. I am taking it upon myself to reveal to you what I feel
are some of the major forms of poo on the face of the planet.

Lust, Gluttony, Greed, Sloth, Wrath, Envy, and Pride, whoever
said these are bad is full of Poo! Like it or not, these are
some of the most motivational urges known to mankind. We go to
work and make more money than it takes to survive (greed) to
eat things that I enjoy plus dessert (gluttony). I enjoy doing
my work to the fullest of my abilities (pride) and Lard forbid
I see someone with something that I would like to have (envy)
and go out and buy it. I hate people who seek to control
others (wrath) and relax one day of the week and do absolutely
nothing (sloth). "Original Sin" is my favorite! They try to
take the one thing that keeps the human race alive, and make
it "evil". I don't know about you but I am glad my father had
a sexual interest in my mother (lust). Those who would try to
enslave someone else would say that the things which come
natural to the human animal are bad or evil. I'm not buying
that bucket full of Poo!

Now we move on to a type of person that deserves an honorable
mention in an essay on Poo, these are the High and Mighty. You
know the type I am referring to, they are the reason God's
green earth exists. A bad day for them is survived only by
slandering others from dusk till dawn! On a good day these
self aggrandized pukes can't seem to get enough of stroking
themselves with one obsessive thought, "If you got it and you
know it Toot your own horn!" I'm sorry to bust your bubble,
but if you were all that and a bag of chips then everyone else
would be tooting your horn for you.

Moving on to the worst type of Poo known to mankind, it's the
self destructive Poo that we put ourselves through day in and
day out and refuse to admit or change. Here is a list of
situations that can be included: Abusive relationships, drug
and alcohol abuse, continuing a vocation that is too stressful
for your personality type, etc. Need I say anything more?
I hope not.

Here I sit all broken hearted and wipe up another smear
session. Once you sift through my poo you will see that there
are three types of poo floating in this bowl of an essay.
There is poo that has been passed down through the ages that
we are suppose to take as gospel truth and never question,
other people's poo, and your own poo. A word from the wise,
don't submit yourself to any more POO than you have to!